NASCAR NEWS...Jeff Gordon fires his entire pit crew.

This announcement followed Gordon's decision to take advantage of the
government's scheme to employ Harlem youngsters.

The decision to hire them was brought about by a recent documentary on
how unemployed youths from Harlem were able to remove a set of wheels in less than 6 seconds
without proper equipment, whereas Gordon's existing crew could only do it in 8 seconds
with millions of dollars worth of high tech equipment. It was thought to be an excellent
and bold move by Gordon's management team as most races are won or lost in the pits.
However-Gordon got more than he bargained for!

At the crew's first practice session, not only was the inexperienced crew
able to change all 4 wheels in under 6 seconds, but within 12 seconds they had changed the
paint scheme, altered the Vin number, and sold the car to Dale Jr. for 10 cases of Bud, a bag of
weed, and some photos of Jeff Gordon's wife in the shower.