THE MIRACLE OF TOILET PAPER

Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror complaining to my
husband that my breasts are too small.
Instead of characteristically telling me it's not so, he
uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. 'If you want your breasts
to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between them
for a few seconds.'
Willing to try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and stand in front
of the mirror, rubbing it between my breasts.
'How long will this take?' I asked.
'They will grow larger over a period of years,' my husband replies.

I stopped. 'Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my
breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?'
Without missing a beat he says 'Worked for your butt, didn't it?'
He's still alive, and with a great deal of therapy, he may even walk again,
although he will probably continue to take his meals through a straw.